7 Warning Signs You’re Dealing with a Narcissist (and How to Spot Them Early)
7 Warning Signs You’re Dealing with a Narcissist (and How to Spot Them Early)
Mike Sullivan 7 Signs You’re Dealing with a Narcissist
Spotting a narcissist early can save you months or even years of emotional turmoil. But narcissists rarely walk into your life announcing themselves. They’re often charming at first—attentive, charismatic, and full of grand stories. It’s only after time passes that the mask starts to slip. Here are seven clear signs you may be dealing with a narcissist, explained in everyday, relatable terms.
Behind The Mask: The Rise Of A Narcissist
1. Constant Need for Attention
Narcissists crave attention like oxygen. They want to be the centre of every conversation, the star in every room, and the reason everyone is laughing or reacting. They don’t listen—they wait for their turn to speak, usually to outshine or redirect the focus back to themselves.
Whether they interrupt your story with one of their own, change the subject to something about them, or create drama to recapture the spotlight, it’s all part of their need to feel important. When they’re not the focus, they feel invisible—and invisibility to a narcissist feels like rejection.
This need for constant attention often leaves others feeling exhausted or overlooked. In relationships, it means your needs come second—or not at all.
2. Lack of Empathy
A defining trait of narcissists is their lack of genuine empathy. They may mimic concern, but it’s rarely heartfelt. When you’re hurting, confused, or anxious, they might respond with indifference, irritation, or subtle mockery.
They struggle—or outright refuse—to see things from your perspective. Instead of offering emotional support, they may minimise your pain, shift blame onto you, or even use your vulnerability against you later.
Empathy requires emotional depth and the ability to connect with someone else’s experience. Narcissists often lack this depth. To them, emotions are tools to manipulate, not signals to understand. When you realise that your feelings are regularly dismissed, invalidated, or used as ammunition, you’re likely not dealing with someone emotionally safe.
3. Excessive Self-Importance
Narcissists view themselves as superior. They believe they are more talented, more intelligent, or more deserving than others—whether it’s true or not. They exaggerate achievements, name-drop, or fish for compliments constantly.
This inflated sense of self isn’t always loud or boastful. Sometimes, it’s hidden behind martyrdom or quiet entitlement. They may act like they’ve sacrificed everything for others and deserve endless praise or recognition for it.
The problem with this self-importance is that it creates a dynamic where your worth is automatically diminished. Your achievements are brushed aside. Your thoughts and needs are made to feel inferior. Over time, this imbalance chips away at your confidence.
4. Manipulative Behaviour
Narcissists are skilled manipulators. They twist facts, rewrite history, and shift blame in ways that leave you second-guessing yourself. You may walk away from a conversation feeling confused, even guilty—without knowing why.
One of their favourite tools is gaslighting: making you doubt your memory, feelings, or perception of reality. They might deny something they said—even if you have proof—or accuse you of being too sensitive, overreacting, or imagining things.
They also use guilt, flattery, and silence to control situations. If you catch them out, they’ll deflect with charm or rage. Manipulation is never about understanding—it’s about winning. The goal is to keep you disoriented, compliant, and emotionally dependent.
5. Entitlement Mentality
Rules are for everyone else. That’s how a narcissist sees the world. They believe they deserve special treatment, whether they’ve earned it or not. If they want something, they expect it. If you set a boundary, they’ll find a way around it.
This entitlement often shows up in everyday interactions. They might expect you to drop everything for them, even if you’re busy or unwell. They may demand forgiveness without taking accountability or expect gifts, praise, and loyalty without offering the same in return.
When things don’t go their way, they react with anger or silent punishment. You may find yourself constantly adjusting to keep the peace—while they continue taking without giving back.
6. Boundary Violations
Healthy people respect boundaries. Narcissists test them. And when they realise a line has been drawn, they often see it as a challenge to cross.
They might read your private messages, turn up uninvited, or ignore your need for space. They’ll guilt-trip you when you say no, or accuse you of being selfish, disloyal, or uncaring. The truth is, they view boundaries as a threat to their control.
Over time, this disrespect chips away at your sense of autonomy. You may start to feel like your life is no longer your own. That’s the goal: to create an environment where you feel powerless to say “enough.”
7. Difficulty Accepting Criticism
Narcissists struggle with any form of critique—even when it’s constructive or gently delivered. Their self-image is so fragile that any perceived challenge to it feels like a personal attack.
Instead of taking feedback on board, they deflect, deny, or attack. They might accuse you of being ungrateful, too critical, or jealous. Some will retaliate with rage, others with sulking or silent treatment.
This inability to accept responsibility creates a toxic dynamic. You can’t resolve issues, because they won’t admit fault. Instead, you end up apologising to avoid conflict—while the same patterns continue.
Final Thoughts
Dealing with a narcissist can feel like living in a hall of mirrors—confusing, exhausting, and emotionally draining. The longer you stay in the relationship, the more your sense of reality gets distorted.
Spotting these red flags early can help you protect your boundaries, trust your instincts, and make informed decisions about who you allow into your life. You deserve relationships built on mutual respect, honesty, and emotional safety.
Narcissists may never change, but you can reclaim your clarity and strength.
Check these out!
Behind The Mask: The Rise Of A Narcissist
15 Rules To Deal With Narcissistic People.: How To Stay Sane And Break The Chain.
A Narcissists Handbook: The ultimate guide to understanding and overcoming narcissistic and emotional abuse.
Boundaries with Narcissists: Safeguarding Emotional, Psychological, and Physical Independence.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: A Guided Journal for Recovery and Empowerment: Reclaim Your Identity, Build Self-Esteem, and Embrace a Brighter Future
(Sponsored.). https://betterhelp.com/elizabethshaw
Advertisements
Click on the links below to join Elizabeth Shaw – Life Coach, on social media for more information on Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse.
On Facebook.
On YouTube.
On Twitter.
On Instagram.
On Pinterest.
On LinkedIn.
On TikTok
The online courses are available by Elizabeth Shaw.
For the full course.
Click here to sign up for the full, Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse, with a link in the course to a free, hidden online support group with fellow survivors.
For the free course.
Click here to sign up for the free online starter course.
To help with overcoming the trauma bond and anxiety course.
Click here for the online course to help you break the trauma bond, and those anxiety triggers.
All about the narcissist Online course.
Click here to learn more about the narcissist personality disorder.
The narcissists counter-parenting.
Click here for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse, and information on co-parenting with a narcissist.
Elizabeth Shaw is not a Doctor or a therapist. She is a mother of five, a blogger, a survivor of narcissistic abuse, and a life coach, She always recommends you get the support you feel comfortable and happy with. Finding the right support for you. Elizabeth has partnered with BetterHelp (Sponsored.) where you will be matched with a licensed councillor, who specialises in recovery from this kind of abuse.
Click here for Elizabeth Shaw’s Recommended reading list for more information on recovery from narcissistic abuse.
